Baseball is the only sport that can pull off this nostalgia, and I’m not sure why they don’t do it more. Once a month they could put two teams in either a historically significant park or just a park that was a movie set. Field of Dreams game? Once a season. Rickwood Field? Once a season. Where the Hackensack Bulls played for Montgomery Brewster? Once a season! Do a stick ball game once a year! Yes, get two teams to play in the streets and make the players bring the bases! Rizzo forgot his backpack so 2nd base is Judge’s jockstrap? Well, it is what it is! Let’s go! Love this, give us more novelty. Of course, it would be nice if it were better teams. Yesterday’s Rickwood Field game was MLB at its best. Do this more! Find better pitchers though than Keaton Winn (2 2/3 IP, 5 ER, ERA at 7.16) vs. Andre Pallante (5 1/3 IP, 5 ER, ERA at 5.23). But it’s still cool! Even with the terrible pitching. Thankfully, terrible pitching leads to you guessed it! Alabama boy, Brendan Donovan (3-for-4, 3 RBIs) hit his 7th homer, and his 2nd homer in three games. So, BDon isn’t just known for hating Bo Bichette now! Also, in this game, and the real breakout — Heliot Ramos (1-for-5, 3 RBIs) hit his 10th homer, and his 3rd homer this week. Oh, and he has speed too. The average will come down (currently at .307), but 20/12/.270 in only 100 games ain’t bad. It’s not Willie Mays, but it’s better than Wyatt Langford. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Jake Bloss – Astros called him up for today’s start, and with Verlander’s IL stint, he could be in line for more starts. So, you might win some, but you just Jake Bloss one. From The Athletic article on him, “In 2023, Bloss won Big East Pitcher of the Year honors at Georgetown, where he obtained a master’s degree in finance.” Damn, who is he, my uncle? Is he 47 trying to get a bump in salary? Do the Astros pay extra for a master’s? I have a master’s degree, how much will they pay me? Was he pitching against other 40-year-olds going for their master’s degrees? “Hey, Margaret, this guy’s got a five-pitch arsenal. A four-seamer that hits 98 and a cutter and curve that are solid, but that slider? Margaret, watch out for that pitch! And good luck on your Master’s of Library Science final. The Dewey Decimal system is nuts.” Bloss looks like a mess on command, and I would wait-and-see in most mixed leagues.
Joey Loperfido – Being recalled. Unlike who’s the Bloss, grab Loperfido in every league.
Yordan Alvarez – 3-for-5, 2 RBIs and his 15th homer, hitting .296. Only 35 more! (I’d take 25 more!)
Dylan Moore -1-for-3, 2 RBIs and a slam (8) and legs (13). Kicking myself that I didn’t draft Dylan Moore in any crazy deep leagues. Not saying in the top 300, but more like the top 600. He’s one of those guys that sits out there in a Draft & Hold in round 49 of 50, and he always returns value.
Luis Castillo – 5 IP, 5 ER, ERA at 3.63. If you accidentally drafted all hitters in the top 100 of your draft, and forgot to draft a starter, you’d be kicking ass.
Andres Gimenez – 2-for-4, 2 RBIs and his 5th homer. Someone asked about dropping Gimenez yesterday, so I went to look where he was on the Player Rater. He’s top 100 overall. Cust kayin’.
Will Brennan – 3-for-4, and his 7th and 8th homer. Move over Fry, there’s a new random Guards player hitting the plate.
Jasson Dominguez – Expected to miss eight weeks. Damn. Guess that answers how the Yankees make room in their outfield. They don’t need to.
Luis Gil – 1 1/3 IP, 7 ER, ERA at 2.77. Regression Fairies, do you have no dignity? Are you awful because of childhood scars? Must you lash out? Ugh, now until Gil is shut down I have to do the math of what his ERA would be without this start.
Gleyber Torres – 1-for-2 and his 7th homer. When the Yanks are down seven runs, Gleyber goes into overdrive.
Aaron Judge – 2-for-3, 3 RBIs and his 27th homer. Welcome back, Dong Cheezo.
Cedric Mullins – 2-for-6, 3 runs, 2 RBIs and his 7th homer. Everyone in the O’s lineup is dangerous, except Mullins. So, Mullins is the one to homer off Gil. An emoji that wears a potato sack and staggers onto a highway.
Anthony Santander – 2-for-5, 3 RBIs and his 19th homer, and 5th homer in a week. Oh my God, I just saw a flash of the future. Santander is exactly the type of guy the Yanks give an inexplicable 5-year deal.
Gunnar Henderson – 3-for-5, 3 runs and his 12th steal. O’s were like, “That’s nice that you’re in 1st place, Yanks, but we’re an actual good team.”
CJ Abrams – Day-to-day with a Ganglion cyst near his wrist. Mad Lion is famous for the song Take It Easy; Ganglion cyst is famous for the doctor saying take it easy. It’s symmetry of the universe. We’re all connected. [bows, hits head on desk] Whoever made this stupid desk knows we’re connected and is out to get me!
MacKenzie Gore – 5 IP, 4 ER, 12 baserunners, 7 Ks, ERA at 3.49. Wrapping myself in waterproof, breathable fabric because it’s Gore-tex while I watch Wes Craven because it’s gore, as I tell people about my travels to Gore-Imma-stan because I’m a big-time fan. So, maybe I want more people to profess love, but I see Gore lumped into starter groups every day where he’s much better. It’s like “Gore or Hunter Brown?” Hunter Brown of a 4.72 ERA or the guy I wrote a preseason sleeper post about? Hmm, let’s see.
Jesse Winker – 2-for-4 and his 8th homer, and 2nd homer in as many games, hitting .270. Blinker and you’ll miss how valuable’s been the Winker.
Lane Thomas – 1-for-4 and his 8th homer, 4th homer in a week, hitting .229. Lane Thomas has as many homers this week as Acuña had this year. Sorry, low blow.
Christian Walker – 2-for-5 and his 17th homer. Onward Christian Walker!
Jake McCarthy – 3-for-4, 2 runs and his 11th and 12th steal, hitting near-.400 in the last week. He won’t be in this afternoon’s Buy column, but looks like he’s schmotato’ing a bit.
Ryne Nelson – 7 IP, 2 ER, 3 hits, zero walks, 70 pitches, 2 Ks, ERA at 5.18. Streamonator hates him, and I don’t trust him either.
Zack Littell – 5 IP, 2 ER, 7 baserunners, 5 Ks, ERA at 4.20. Glad to see they’ve legalized having ERAs be 4.20. The decriminalization of ERAs. Finally.
Yandy Diaz – 2-for-5, 2 RBIs and his 5th homer. Almost picked him up as a batty call, but I stupidly looked at how awful he’s been all season like that matters for one game. Don’t cry for me, Argentina, I batty called Carlos Santana instead. Smooth!
Jose Siri – 2-for-5 and his 9th homer, 2nd homer in four games. He’ll be in this afternoon’s Buy column, because of course, Siri typed it up.
Ryan McMahon – 2-for-4 and his 13th homer. Rockies wear purple…McMahon and McDonald’s both start with Mick…Hey, is Ryan related to Grimace?
Freddie Freeman – 2-for-5 and his 11th homer, hitting .301. He just missed a 2nd home run, that would’ve been out of a couple parks. Shame can’t hit homers in more than one park at a time and get some Schrodingers.
Shohei Ohtani – 1-for-3 and his 21st homer, as he hits leadoff since Betts was injured. Some managers would take whoever was playing short (Rojas) and move him to Betts’ spot, but Dave Bobs just removes Betts and moves everyone up. Which is better (lazier)?
Gavin Stone – 5 1/3 IP, 2 ER, 6 baserunners, 7 Ks, ERA at 3.04. In what sounds like the weirdest game of paper, rock, scissors, Stone beat the Rox.
Manny Machado – 2-for-3, 3 RBIs and his 7th homer, hitting .253. Just looked at where Machado was on the Player Rater, and it’s worse than I expected. Prior to last night, he was below Matt Vierling.
Fernando Tatis Jr. – 4-for-5 and his 14th homer, hitting .280. Fun The Jewels! Fun The Jewels fast! We’re due for a new album from them, huh?
Jackson Merrill – 1-for-4 and his 9th homer, and 2nd homer in the last two games. Merrill was the season’s first Buy column, and he’s still not picked up.
Jake Cronenworth – 2-for-5, 2 runs and 11th homer, as he walked it off in the 9th, which I know because I watched after an episode of the collectibles show on Netflix. Seems like a terrible person IRL, as the kids say, but highly entertaining to watch.
Zack Gelof – 2-for-4, 2 RBIs and his 8th homer, 2nd homer in two games, 3rd homer in three games, fourth time in, like, a week I’m saying stop holding against him how bad he was in April.
Freddy Fermin – 3-for-4, and his 3rd and 4th homer, hitting .303. Yesterday, Freddie Freeman and Freddy Fermin combined for three homers. You know who had a huge day? The one guy in the auction league who was like, “Let’s start Freddie Freeman’s bidding at a $1,” and everyone was like, “He’s already on your team for $38, you idiot,” then that guy said, “Uh, I mean, Freddy Fermin,” to save face.
Bobby Witt Jr. – 1-for-4 and his 12th homer, hitting .322. It’s kinda crazy that as recently as last year people thought he would struggle to hit .220. Yes, I is that people.
Seth Lugo – 6 2/3 IP, 2 ER, 9 baserunners, 8 Ks, ERA at 2.42. [enters a confessional booth] “Hello, Father? May all my regression be as timid Seth Lugo’s.” “Son, what’s your confession?” “Uh, I’m not Catholic.”
Jose Miranda – 2-for-5, 3 RBIs and his 8th homer, hitting .280, and 2nd homer in four games. For what it’s Cronenworth, all Twins, except Larnach and Jeffers, have been hot.
Carlos Santana – 3-for-5, 2 runs and his 12th homer, 2nd homer in a week, and was near the top of the 7-day Player Rater, which I know from looking at it for this afternoon’s Buy column. Any hoo! Schmotato.
Simeon Woods Richardson – 6 IP, 2 ER, 6 baserunners, 6 Ks, ERA at 3.26. Look at that ERA again. Ya know who SWR is doing? Your moms! Sorry, cheap shot. He’s doing what we expected from Bailey Ober.
Royce Lewis – 1-for-3 and his 9th homer, hitting .377. With an assist by frequent commenter, Will (the other one), “Royce Lewis’s MLB career so far (85 games) – .319 / .377 / .606 / .983 with 26 HRs, 70 RBI and 6 steals in 308 total at bats.” Seriously, put him in one of those Sumo wrestling fat suits then inside a giant bubble. Saw this stat the other day and meant to mention it: Lewis has had consecutive hitless games only three times in his career. That’s absurd. Yes, I know, he’s also only stayed healthy in consecutive games thrice too.
Max Kepler – Tried to bunt with two outs (!) and slid into first base, hurting himself. After the game, he said he got the idea from reading Nick Punto’s autobiography, “What If They Made The Whole Body Out Of The Appendix?”
