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Crews Missile Locked In And Hoping To Arrive With A Bang

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The Washington Nats are set to call up top prospect slash phenom slash heartthrob slash outfielder Dylan Crews for Monday’s game against the Yankees. Yes, this luxury Crews is finally porting at Nationals harbor. Why do the Nats keep announcing their call ups three days in advance? Is it to give him extra time to say his goodbyes? Or is it just to save money? Don’t answer that. Crews, who I will now appropriately refer to as DC new King of the District, was the second overall pick in the 2023 draft and was slashing .270/.342/.451 through 100 AA and AAA games this year, with 13 homers, 68 RBI and 25 steals. Yes, please, and thank you to all of that. He could probably steal 50 bases on this team. All they do is steal! The 17% K% and .793  OPS might leave something to be desired but he’s only 22 years old and he showed marked improvement in both areas upon promotion to AAA! In other words, give the kid some time! He was number one on The Itch’s prospect stash list ahead of guys named Jasson and Bubba so you know the hype must be real. Those are some great names. As Itch mentioned, August has been very kind to DC, slashing .306/.366/.542 with a .908 OPS in 17 games, adding 14 RBI, five steals and four home runs including this monster. Oh boy, that’s a pretty swing innit? Crews missile for sure! He followed up that homer Monday with four hits and a steal on Tuesday! Did I mention he plays defense? We get it, you’re ready for the BIGS! Grey told you to BUY and said “He could be a 30/30 guy with a solid average. That’s worth grabbing in all leagues.” I agree! I’m shipping my love of Dylan Crews and his perfectly pure power swing. Also, like I said above, all the Nats do is run so he should see plenty of action on the base paths. Do I need to remind you he was Paul Skenes teammate? Yup, matching mustaches. Crews is Livvy Dunne’s boyfriend’s college friend. It doesn’t get any more can’t miss than that. At this point in the year you’re not finding anyone with a ceiling like Crews’ on waivers, unless his name is Jasson Dominguez. DC is worth an add on the chance he starts hot out of the gate, so take a flier on Dylan and hopefully he can help you Crews control to a championship.

Here’s what else I saw in fantasy baseball Friday night:

Aaron Judge – 1-for-4, HR (49). Clear your schedule Maris family! His fifth in the last four games! He’s batting .378 with 45 homers over his last 99 games. This guys got some pop! Sweet sassy molassy! He extends his hitting streak to 11 (ELEVEN) games, with eight home runs in that stretch. He’s got 10 more bombs than the next closest player, on pace for a cool 62. Also, how about that 224 wRC+? The power is real, and it’s spectacular!

Giancarlo Stanton – 1-for-4, HR (22). Honestly, if it wasn’t for Bobby Witt, Jr., Judge would be a lock for the triple crown, it’s absolutely crazy that–oh wait, we moved on to the next blurb. Sorry!

Carlos Rodon – 6.0 IP, 4 hits, 0 ER, BB, 5 K, 14th win. What if they let all my fantasy pitchers face Colorado on the road? Would that fix my crippling depression or nah?

Tyler Stephenson – 2-for-3, HR (17), RBI. Eight game hitting streak for Tyler the run creator, hitting .368 in that stretch including this bombo. The 17 dingers is a career high for Stephenson, with seven since the all star break. Can we get to 25?

Joey Bart – 2-for-4, 2 runs, RBI. Don’t have a cow, man, but Bart has been making opposing pitchers eat all of his shorts with a .858 OPS since arriving in Pittsburgh. He’s hitting .308 in the past week and usually bats clean up, what more do you want from your catcher?

Aroldis Chapman – 1.0 IP, 1 hit, BB, 3 K, 21st hold. David Bednar – 1.0 IP, 1 hit, BB, K, SV (23). Bednar got the save, but it’s been Chapman who’s been lights out, 0.82 ERA, 0.55 WHIP over the last month, with a 19/1 K/BB. Saves aren’t everything, folks!

Colton Cowser – 2-for-4, HR (19). He’s pretty much a lock for rookie of the year honors at this point. It’s Bovine intervention!

Anthony Santander – 2-for-4, go-ahead Grand Slam HR (38). To the bank! Great call bee tee dubs, I got goosies from that one! SlamTander!  Also, hoo boy! Some poor team is going to give him way too much money next year.

Jose Altuve – 2-for-4, HR (17), 2 RBI. Imagine doubting Jose Altuve! He gave the home run bat to a fan who called it the “best thing in his life.” Relateble. Well if that doesn’t get you all fuzzy inside you should go crunch numbers with HitterTron and StreamONator.

Jeremy Pena – 2-for-4, HR (13), 2 RBI. Just do what the Short King leading off does! Jose leads by example!

Hunter Brown – 6.0 IP, 3 hits, ER, 2 BB, 6 K. Brown town! Let’s rewind cause my dude had a 9.78 ERA at the start of May and has managed to get it down to 3.72 through hard work and determination. These O’s are no easy matchup but Brown was able to notch his 14th quality start of the year. He’s been one of the best pitchers in baseball over the last month with a 2.70 ERA, 1.13 WHIP and 33/10 K/BB. I am sorry I abandoned you so soon, Hunter, hopefully, we can get past this and have a productive 2025 together.

Seranthony Dominguez – 1.0 IP, SV (5). Seranthony looked much better in this one, which shouldn’t be that difficult, just don’t allow another home run. The bar was low, but Dominguez leaped over it slamming the door to shut down the Astros for the save. I still think Craig Kimbrel (1.0, 2 hits, 2 K, 7th win) eventually gets the gig back, but it’s Seranthony’s job to lose for now. Godspeed.

Joey Loperfido – 2-for-4, HR (4). I knew he was going to be good someday! He’s hitting .500 over the past week with two homers. He’s so brat right now. Did I use that right? Probably not.

Ryne Nelson – 6.0 IP, 5 hits, 2 ER, BB, 7 K, 9th win. He’s rocking a sub-3 ERA, sub-1 WHIP and 62/12 K/BB since the start of July. If they send him to the pen for Jordan Montgomery I might scream.

Eugenio Suarez – 3-for-5, HR (19), 5 RBI. The DBags scored 12 runs with 16 hits, and four of Genio’s ribbies were the result of a grand slam home run, his second in the past week. That’s more than the Red Sox have hit all season. Suarez now has 13 home runs and 42 RBI since the start of July slashing .296/.351/.609. Sure Carroll’s been looking better but it’s guys like Suarez who are carrying the Snakes to October right now.

Pete Crow-Armstrong – 2-for-3, 2 runs, HR (6). This is your PSA that PCA is one of the fastest men in the world, rounding the bases in 14 seconds to score an inside the parker. How fast do you think Elly could do it?

Miguel Amaya – 2-for-4, HR (7), 2 RBI. Back to back games with a homer! Watch him Amaya this ball as it sails over the wall. That’s my admire pun, hope you got it!

Jorge Lopez – 1.0 IP, 0 ER, 2 K, SV (4). Porter Hodge, who Grey told you to BUY, entered in the seventh inning and pitched through the 8th for the win, but it was Lopez who got his second save of the week. Hodge has looked like the better pitcher lately (0.00 ERA, 0.82 WHIP, 11/3 K/BB over the last two weeks 7.1 IP), but manager’s be managing in mysterious ways sometimes. Mysterious and stupid. Not enough save opps to go around to own both of them so throw a dart and pick one and regret it later. You can blame me if you want.

Tanner Bibee – 5.2 IP, 8 hits, 4 ER, BB, 6 K, 6th L. Not your best Tanner. More of a bronzer.

Nathan Eovaldi – 6.0 IP, 7 hits, 3 ER, BB, 5 K, 9th win. He’s been underwhelmingly getting the job done. Everything about his numbers are respectable: 3.79 ERA, 1.10 WHIP and a 128/30 K/BB, yet when I watch  his starts its more stressful than an episode of the Bear. Thankfully, he gets a juicy juice match up with the Shite Sox next week and hopefully I can unclench for the six innings he pitches in that one.

Chris Sale – 7.0 IP, 9 hits, 2 ER, BB, 4 K. Jorge Soler’s poor defense cost Sale a double in this one, so this could’ve, should’ve been a shutout but Sale’s ratios remain elite (2.62 ERA, 1.02 WHIP, 191/33 K/BB) and he’s got to be at least the sentimental favorite for the Cy Young so far.

Ramon Laureano – 3-for-4, SB (5). He was a BUY and he’s hitting .409 in the past week with two homers and a steal! If that’s not skibbidi toilet Ohio rizz I don’t know what is! Really I don’t, someone explain it to me?

Michael Harris II – 1-for-5, HR (7). Two years ago, I would have killed a man (probably a small man) for MH2 to be the lead off guy in this Atlanta line up. I’m finally getting my wish–but at what cost!

Salvador Perez – 2-for-4, HR (23), 3 RBI. Hard to believe my friend has only topped 30 homers once in his career but he’s well on his way this year! Did you see the video of Sal playing wiffle ball with some neighborhood kids? Honestly, this is Ruthian levels of epicness. Whata guy!

Lucas Erceg – 1.0 IP, 1 hit, 0 ER, K, SV (7). If James McArthur’s new 7th inning duties don’t have you convinced, how about the fact that Lucas has yet to surrender a run as a Royal? He’s got a 15/0 K/BB in 11.1 innings since joining his new club and with KC locked in a wild card race he could be one of the most valuable adds you can make the rest of the year. Grey told you to BUY and if you can’t tell by my gushing you should add him everywhere.

Michael Wacha – 6.0 IP, 6 hits, 2 ER, 5 K, 11th win. Wacha’s been no joke, Fozzy B! That’s five straight quality starts with four wins in that stretch with just 8 ER allowed in 32 innings. The Royals have always been a disastrous bullpen away from being a contender and now that Erceg has added some stability to the pen I’m here to delcare the Royals are a wagon, ya’ll!

Brendan Donovan  – 1-for-3, 2 runs, HR (10), SB (4), slashing .266/.333/.393. The slam & legs in Minneapolis is served at the state fair where you can eat iconic Minnesota dishes like hotdish, hot beef, and deep fried ranch. Whatever it is, like BDon it needs more tots!

Andre Pallante – 7.0 IP, 5 hits, ER, 2 BB, 5 K, 6th win. Dude is fighting for his job out here and puts in his best start of the year. Not sure I’d start him with your team but he’s looked good over his past three against some strong opponents and now has back to back quality starts. If Streamonator likes it I could see considering the prospect of maybe thinking about mulling over the possibility of contemplating whether or not I should review the option of potentially picking him up. I still don’t know for sure though!

Joe Musgrove – 7.0 IP, 1 hit, 0 ER, 0 BB, 9 K, 4th win. Hello, Joe! It’s nice to see you again, when did you get back? Two weeks ago!? Well this was his first start BACK back as far as I’m concerned and he had it all working for him against a Mets team that could not touch him. He also made a real sweet defensive play to keep his shut out in tact. I’ll wait for Vin for the consensus but methinks this start makes the top 100 fantasy starts of the year? Welcome back, Joe!

Paul Blackburn – 2.1 IP, 10 hits, 5 ER. Blackburn’d! Left the game with a hand contusion, but not before destroying your ratios. Thanks for that.

Luis Arraez – 3-for-5, HR (4), 2 RBI slashing .306/.339/.38. Luis makes it look so ArraEZ!

Aaron Civale – 4.0 IP, 4 hits, 3 ER, 4 BB, 3 K. I’m starting to think Oakland is not the team to be streaming against anymore. They’re kind of dangerous. Not the city the team!

Rhys Hoskins – 1-for-4, HR (21), 4 RBI. Brewers scored 11 runs on 14 hits including this 3-run shotski. Grey was probably a year early on the 40 homer prediction but I could see falling to pieces for Rhys’ swing next year, too!

Lawrence Butler – 1-for-4, HR (14), 2 RBI. The Butler is doing it again, serving up ding dongs! He got crazy hot a month ago, could this be the start of another streak? I don’t know!

Luis Castillo – 6.0 IP, 6 hits, 5 ER, 9 K. The nine Ks are nice, as are the zero walks. The three home runs allowed not-so-much.

Luke Raley – 2-for-3, HR (16), 2 RBI. Sixteenth homer and five more than J-Rod. If this is what it looked like when a Mariner gets hot no wonder they fired the manager.

Heliot Ramos – 2-for-4, HR (19). Michael Conforto also homered (14). Bat Out of Heliot is batting .285/.341/.501 and crushed a 420+ foot moonshot to the, uhh, moon. Come Heliot or high water! You literally got my dude off the trash heap in May and look at you now! I told you to grab him back in June and that was pretty okay advice I gave that one time.

Bobby Miller – 6.0 IP, 7 hits, 3 ER, 9 K. Ignore the 7.49 ERA and just focus on the 99+ mph gas, the strikeouts and the fact that he’s on the Dodgers, and he starts to look REAL good actually.

Michael Kopech – 1.0 IP, 2 K, 4th win. Kopech has been so good out of the Dodgers pen that he’s made all the other guys step it up and pitch better just so he doesn’t steal their jobs. He might anyway.

Junior Caminero – 2-for-4, HR (1), 2 RBI. Have a day rook! Or should I call you Junior? The youngster sends this fastball 400+ feet to oppo fieldo for the first big league ding dong of his career! 110 mph EV! That’s some real power, folks. Considering the timing of his callup and the team that’s around him I’m not sure we’re hyping up Junior enough. He’s an absolute beast and was hitting the ball harder than anyone last night, yes including Ohtani and Mookie! Two of my favorite people in the world.

Shohei Ohtani – 2-for-5, Grand Slam HR (40), SB (40). Master Brohei became the sixth player to join the 40/40 club last night, and he did it in the most dramatic fashion possible. “Grand” fashion if you will? With the game tied at three with two outs in the 9th inning and just a measly 1-for-4 with a stolen base to his name, Ohtani hit a go-ahead grand salami to seal the win and his spot in history. This is honestly the most Shohei Ohtani thing ever. Everyone in that stadium, all 2500 Rays fans and even the pitcher, I mean, especially the pitcher, knew that was coming and Shohei delivered like he always seems to. He’s setting an unreasonable precedent for what a $700 million player should look like. He’s well on track to be the first 45/45 player ever, as well as maybe, possibly, probably the first 50/50 player ever and he’s doing all this while rehabbing from Tommy John! Absolutely unreal. We are all witnesses, and lucky to be that. Just wait till we see him pitch this October! This legend’s not done yet!

Thanks for reading! Questions? Problems? Complaints to management? Advice, small gifts or large bribes? Please leave it in the comments below. Join us next Saturday for another Friday recap as fantasy baseball continues next week, all week long!



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