This year has taught us that the Giants bats get hot one bat at a time all season. From Patrick Bailey to Matos to Ramos to Wade Jr. to Chapman to Joey Bart, but on the Pirates to Fitzgerald to Carl’s Jr. Jr. finally to Michael Conforto, who gets the last week of the season. But Conforto, a pal to the pal-less, a friend to the friendless, a chum to the chumless said, “Guys, let’s all get hot together!” And they did. Michael Conforto (1-for-5, 3 RBIs) the hottest of them all hit his 20th homer, and 5th homer in September, and 2nd homer in two games, third homer in five games, fourth homer in six games, and you get the picture. Or rather, he gets the pitcher. Kazoo stinger! Next up, Heliot Ramos (4-for-5, 2 runs) hit his 22nd homer as Mr. Hot The Weeks of June 2nd Through June 17th showed up. But not to be outdone, Mr. July 9th through August 5th, Tyler Fitzgerald (2-for-4, 2 RBIs) hit his 15th. Then Mr. He Seemed Good In April, Patrick Bailey (2-for-4, 3 runs) hit his 8th homer. Finally, Mr. Was Never Hot, Brett Wisely (2-for-5, 3 RBIs) hit his 4th. In all, a true celebration of friendship told through homers. Unless you’re a DBacks player or fan. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Logan Webb – 6 IP, 0 ER, 5 baserunners, 3 Ks, ERA at 3.47 vs. Brandon Pfaadt – 2 2/3 IP, 4 ER, ERA at 4.80. This matchup was billed as the Pfaadt/Webb, or where you find a lot of Before and Afters.
Jack Kochanowicz – 7 IP, 0 ER, 3 hits, zero walks, 4 Ks, ERA at 4.01 vs. Jonathan Cannon – 6 IP, 0 ER, 4 baserunners, 7 Ks, ERA at 4.37.
Angels vs White Sox pic.twitter.com/oA70I7vWvZ
— Razzball (@Razzball) September 25, 2024
Rowdy Tellez – Designated for assignment. Rowdy said, “Is my assignment to find the best bagels in town?” It’s actually kinda gross why he was DFA’d and not bagel-related. He was set to earn $200K if he reached 425 plate appearances and he was at 421. Stay cheap, Pirates.
Tobias Myers – 4 IP, 2 ER, ERA at 3.09, and out after 49 pitches. Pitch counts the final week of the season = the death to society.
Tanner Bibee – 7 IP, 1 ER, 6 baserunners, 7 Ks, ERA at 3.47. If that is his final start of the season, then I tip my hat. Actually, not wearing a hat. I doff Bud Selig’s toupee. He will be underrated again next year. Bibee, not Selig.
Lane Thomas – 1-for-4, 3 RBIs and his 15th homer, 2nd homer in four games. I totally called it when he was traded. I said the Nats wanted him to run, even if unsuccessfully to make him more attractive to potential suitors, but it doesn’t mean the Guards will run him. How does it track that a team wanted to trade for a guy who did a thing they don’t want? I don’t know, but it does.
Kyle Manzardo – 1-for-3, 2 runs and his 5th homer, 2nd homer in five games. Perhaps, he whispered quizzically, schmotato?
Yordan Alvarez – Sounds like he’s basically done until Friday, if not for the year, due to his knee. Lowercase captain woo cubano.
Jason Heyward – 1-for-3 2 RBIs and his 10th homer, 2nd homer in two games. I’m embarrassed to say it, but hot schmotato alert.
Alex Bregman – 2-for-4 and his 26th homer, third homer in five games. Whoa, whoa, whoa! Hold up! Your projection was for 25.7 homers! No rounding! Literally! No rounding the bases!
Kyle Tucker – 1-for-4 and his 23rd homer, 3rd homer in five games. Don’t have him anywhere, but I am happy to see him doing well to give me a little bit more confidence in drafting him next year. I do think the price could be nice. I’m a poet and aware of it.
Framber Valdez – 5 2/3 IP, 3 ER, 10 baserunners, 4 Ks, ERA at 2.91 vs. Logan Gilbert – 6 IP, 4 ER, 6 baserunners, 6 Ks, ERA at 3.33. Never was in on either guy before. Framber by choice, and Logan because he just went before I could take him. Next year, I change that on both. Prepare to be Grey’d!
Austin Riley – Won’t return this year. Shucks I was hoping he’d return on Sunday and hit the 17 homers he owes me.
Marcell Ozuna – 1-for-3, and his 39th homer. Also, in this game, Michael Harris II (3-for-4, 2 runs) and his 16th homer. I have no rooting interest, but if the Braves sweep the Mets, I will howl, and Mets fans will put Grimace in shackles.
Spencer Schwellenbach – 7 IP, 1 ER, 4 baserunners, 4 Ks, ERA at 3.47. I don’t know who will be next year’s Touki–I mean Teheran–I mean Kyle Wright–I mean Ian Anderson–I mean Schwellenbach! But whoever it is, I want him.
Mark Vientos – 2-for-4 and his 26th homer, hitting .270. Deserve to lose when you move Vientos down the order and Nimmo and Marte up.
Ryan Mountcastle – 1-for-2 as he was activated from the IL. This forced the O’s to send Eloy down to the minors. Eloy, bro, my man, can I make a suggestion? You’d be Barry Bonds in the KBO.
Anthony Santander – 1-for-3, 2 runs and his 44th homer. Also, in this game, Colton Cowser (1-for-4) hit his 23rd homer and Ramon Urias (1-for-4) hit his 11th. Similar to thoughts in Ozuna’s blurb, Yanks’ fans sweating over games vs. the O’s is my oxygen. I grew up in Jersey, I know you, and you guys are hilarious.
Aaron Judge – 1-for-3 and his 56th homer. Only needs to steal 45 bags before Sunday and I can see the Judge > Ohtani discussions.
Mitch Spence – 4 2/3 IP, 3 ER, ERA at 4.35. I’ll be honest, this was about as much as I was expecting, even as I streamed him. His name ain’t *itch about Spence.
Nathan Eovaldi – 7 IP, 3 ER, 7 baserunners, 7 Ks, ERA at 3.96. Quite possibly one of the most underrated “under 4.00 ERA pitchers for the five years” pitchers in baseball.
Justin Steele – 4 IP, 2 ER, ERA at 3.07, out after 62 pitches. Why even bother pitch them? Just send them home to their mommies! Pitch counts make me so mad.
Bryce Harper – 2-for-4 and his 30th homer, hitting .287. Currently going over my preseason projections vs. end-of-the-year ones and they will start to be posted next week. Harper ended up solid, but the 1st basemen? Oof.
Kyle Schwarber – 1-for-4, 2 RBIs and his 38th homer, hitting .250, and 2nd homer in two games, third homer in four games. Okay, who told Schwarber it’s June?
Brayan Bello – 4 IP, 2 ER, ERA at 4.49, and out at 75 pitches. Could they just have started an Opener in front of all these guys who were yanked early to try for a win? For us!
Bowden Francis – 5 IP, 0 ER, 4 baserunners, 4 Ks, ERA at 3.30, and out at 71 pitches. He went five innings! What a stud! Seriously, MLB needs to shorten the season to 145-ish games. They never will, but they should. Pitchers can’t throw anymore.
Cole Ragans – 6 IP, 0 ER, 6 baserunners, 6 Ks, ERA at 3.14159265358979323846. Ragans illustrates a big issue with drafting starters early. He did well! You got what you wanted from him. And he still has 11 wins on a good team. Just no decision after no decision for his guy.
Michael King – 5 IP, 0 ER, 5 baserunners, 3 Ks, ERA at 2.95. Next year I’m drafting everyone who appears in a pre-Opening Day overseas kickoff.
Edgardo Henriquez – Dodgers called him up. Edgardo Henriquez touched 104 MPH this year. Not like O’Hoppe catching Ben Joyce. Why call him up? Dodgers said they have 38 pitchers on the IL so we’re kinda “screwedy-be-doodie.” Not sure what that means. Edgardo Henriquez does look like another sexy name to watch, but he’s a pen guy. Like Laszlo Biro.
Landon Knack – 4 IP, 4 ER, ERA at 3.74. So, you’re telling me no streamers are going to be good this week? Ay ay, Captain! Oh, come on, Knack goes to Coors for his final start, how bad could it be? Streamonator says, oh God, no.
Jonah Bride – 3-for-5 and his 9th homer, 2nd homer in two games. Bride’s hot, said the best man as he sipped a Coors at the after-reception bar. That Bride doesn’t come to the plate with The Wedding March is one of the biggest travesties in modern baseball. That and ghost runners.
Bailey Ober – 5 IP, 4 ER, ERA at 3.94. Actually, wish he were pulled after fewer pitches.
Brandon Lowe – 1-for-4 and his 21st homer. Busy working on the positional recaps that will start next week, so have been pouring over the Player Rater, and that Brandon is the highest Lowe is an indictment of all Lowes. Not the lowest of Lowes, that’s Josh. I said that yesterday. And that’s me vaguely repeating me!
Ryan Pepiot – 5 IP, 2 ER, 7 baserunners (4 BBs), 6 Ks, ERA at 3.64. Streamonator says he goes one more time, but I would tread very carefully with what goes on the final weekend with starters starting. “Starters starting?” What am I, an Oompa Loompa?
Tarik Skubal – 7 IP, 0 ER, 3 baserunners, 7 Ks, ERA at 2.39, as he wins the AL Cy Young. Well, not officially, but he is going to win it. It’ll be the first time the Tigers have won the Cy Young since–Wait, what’s this? They’re trading Skubal to the Astros? Nationals? Yankees? Padres? Wow, so many rumors. That’s bizarre. Tigers are playoff contenders why would they trade away Skubal when they have a one-two punch like Skubal and Jack Flaherty?
